Forget the rules. Write your own

Unlock your style in 14 days: Forget the rules. Write your own

Nikki ParkinsonFashion, How to 50 Comments

I’m a little bit emotional.

We’re here. It’s the final day at the Styling You Unlock Your Style Holiday Camp and I’m a bit overwhelmed at how many of you have joined in this journey, sharing your style stories and quite happily receiving a gentle bum kick where required πŸ˜‰

I’ve had a lot of questions as to whether I’ll be creating an e-book from this series and the answer is a resounding YES. Don’t worry, all the content will still be here on the blog, it will be just packaged up in one easy-to-follow book. Plus, with your permission {I’ll contact you first}, I’ll add in some of the comments and photos which have been shared over the past few weeks.

Anyhoo, down to the style business of the day.

You may have realised since day one of this holiday style camp that I’m not one for setting too many rules.

Forget the rules. Make your own.

Sure, I’ll dish out guidelines for anyone who’s happy to listen but I honestly believe that if we box people in with too many style “rules” that those rules can actually be a stumbling block to that person finding and unlocking their style.

If we’re in the change room and mentally going through a checklist of what we should and shouldn’t be buying and wearing based on a set of so-called rules, then it’s so easy to lose sight of what’s reflecting back at you.

It’s too easy to miss that “spark” you need to see when you try something new with a view to buying it.

And, importantly, it’s so easy to lose sight of who YOU are.

Real style comes from within. Real style is about honouring your personality and letting all aspects of that shine through in what you wear.

It’s not about conforming to someone else’s ideal – whether that be a catwalk trend or someone in your life who believes you should dress a certain way.

Of course there are certain situations {particularly in workplaces}Β where you have to meet dress code policies. That’s just life but it’s not your whole life.

I want you to shine.

I want you to feel really good about yourself.

And I want you to have the confidence to make your own style rules to fit who you are and what your lifestyle entails.

No-one’s style choices are right or wrong. They are that person’s choices.

Respect and celebrate those around you who embrace and flaunt their individual style. Compliment those people. Share the style love.

I’ve said many times that this isn’t rocket science, that I’m not solving the big problems of the world, but what I aim to do in this space is celebrate all women.

And I encourage you to do the same in your daily life.

That’s got to make for a happier world, doesn’t it?

Tell me, what’s one thing you’ve taken away from this Unlock Your Style series and implemented in your life?

Forget the rules. Write your own

Style work

This is a simple one to end the series. When you’re out and about today and over the weekend, compliment another woman on some aspect of their style. Maybe their hair looks great or they’re wearing a fabulous statement necklace?

Find the good and share the style love.

It will come back to you a 10 times over.

PS. Don’t forget if you want to share any of your progress via photos, you can upload them in the comments or share via Twitter or Instagram with the hashtag #unlockyourstyle and make sure you tag me so I can find it (@stylingyou). Facebook uploads to my page are welcome Β too.

PPS. I’m off to Bali on Sunday with my family. I’ll be sending you “style” postcards from the tropics all week so stay tuned. There may be kaftans and big earrings involved. And SPF 50+ sunscreen πŸ™‚

PPPS. There’s a few people who have won Styling You manifestos and are yet to make contact: Carla Harris, Stephanie Green, Jools and Allira Sierke, I’m looking at you. If you could please email me your postal address today, I can get these to you before I leave!




** The Styling You Holiday Style Camp {Unlock Your Style in 14 Days} is based on the Styling You Manifesto. If you don’t have your own, you can download it here. I’ll also be giving away a proper printed Styling You Manifesto from The Smile Collective every day to the reader who catches my eye with their comments and participation.

Unlock Your Style in 14 Days (Day 4 manifesto winner): Melanie Lindner. Melanie, could you please email me your postal address: [email protected]

Comments 50

  1. Right, I’ve cleared the diary, bought the garbage bags, and printed out your guide to getting organised. I’m thinking about all the wardrobes within my wardrobe – the exercise wardrobe (I believe a good outfit increases motivation!), the uni student ‘uniform’ wardrobe, the presentation days/job interview wardrobe, and the social going out wardrobe… wish me luck I’m going in!

      1. Well I did it! I spent time on the internet searching for images of clothes and styles I like and I know suit me, and with those visuals in mind I set about sorting through my wardrobe. If it didn’t fit, look good, make me feel great and fit the new look – it went. I can actually find things now! Clothes are going to have to work hard to earn a precious space in my tiny wardrobe now and I’m no longer in fear of appearing on ‘hoarders – buried alive’. Thanks for the motivation to do it Nikki, much appreciated.

        1. Oh Sonya, that’s fantastic to hear. I have precious wardrobe space too (although I may have taken over my son’s wardrobe at the weekend because he’s moving out on Saturday to go to uni!). Each item has to earn its spot!

  2. great series thanks Nikki. Great to have your voice in my head while shopping, to help me stay focused and true to my own style! Happy holidays!

  3. Going to a wedding today. Picked up the cutest kaftan and it makes me feel like a butterfly..was not my chosen outfit and out of my normal dress sense but I love the freedom + excitement it brings. Totally can’t wait to accessorise.

  4. Hi,Nikki,been following your course and love it!!Very inspirational for a woman my age(55)Picked up some good tips too!At the moment i’m busy with work but do intend to put it into practice soon.Have a great holiday!xx

  5. I have had fun remembering all those things u taught me 2 years ago… I have tidied my wardrobe… I have learned the importance of lippy… & I have helped my friend to start unlocking her style both in the fitting room & by sending her over here for this course… Have loved every minute, thanks Nikki

  6. This is a beautiful way to wrap up the series. Thanks πŸ™‚ Over the last couple of weeks I have been talking to other women about your daily prompts and I know that many of them have dropped in to read the latest news. It’s been fun to discuss what we’re wearing and why. We’ve been complimenting each other along the way, encouraging (enabling πŸ˜‰ ) each other to buy and try new things. One bought bright orange heels, another gorgeous black wedges, another her first ever shapewear, another a neon floral jacket, another new lippy, and a few are keen to try on a kaftan….and so on. I love this! So thanks to you Nikki for your provocative daily questions and challenges.

    What I’m mostly taking away from the last couple of weeks, is to be mindful. To think about what I’m wearing, and whether it needs a pop and some pizazz. To pay attention to other clothes in the shop. To pay attention to other clothes, brands, colours. And to have fun πŸ™‚ i.e. not staying in a rut, no matter how lovely it looks.

    I complimented a few women today. It’s a joy to do this.

    Thanks for your encouragement and bum-kicks! xoxo

    1. Oh Kathryn, this really does make me smile. I love that you’ve been spreading the word – that’s a whole lot of feel good for a whole lot of women. And yes, we should always be a work in progress – that’s the fun bit! Thanks for being a part of this!

  7. Great final post for the series Nikki! We should all remember to give back and pay a compliment to someone as it costs us nothing and makes them and you feel good. My first compliment of the weekend goes to you. Lookign beyond amazing in that Leona Edmiston dress! Have a great time in Bali xx

  8. While I am sad to see the end of the daily boot camp, I know I am already so much more empowered and comfortable in my clothing – so it must have worked!
    I’m loving my new streamlined wardrobe – getting ready each day is so much easier. I spent an hour wandering through the shops last night, really looking at different cuts and colours and making a mental wishlist for when the bank account will allow!
    The most important thing I have learned over the last couple of weeks has been that every single day I deserve to look the best I possibly can, and that making a little bit of effort every day pays off in hundreds of small ways. Your boot camp has not just been about fashion, it has been about learning to listen to that little voice inside that has been telling me that I am fabulous and that I deserve all the pretty things, and that I can totally rock them on this amazing body of mine (whatever shape it is that day!).

    Thank you so much – you have started off my year in a wonderful way, and I look forward to reading and learning so much more from you this year!

  9. I have really enjoyed these posts and am also a touch emo that it’s over.

    I’ve put a picframe up on instagram to show you my two favourite two pieces of advice- I’ve added colour and started wearing accessories again… getting those organised was also important for me to access them everyday.

    Have also bought back the lippy… could go on and on really!

    The most important thing is I’m feeling so much better every time I step out, so thank you sincerely.

  10. I have loved this series Nikki,I think the most valuable thing I have gotten out of the posts is to be able to let go of things I was holding onto just because one day I might wear it,I was only kidding myself but I am now very true to my own style and stick to it ,of course I will try on new things and see if they suit but the things hanging in my wardrobe now are things I will always wear and love and feel good in,and that is I think the biggest part of style,feel good look good,and know that you do,when I used to recieve a compliment I didn’t believe it, now I do I know I look good and I always tell other women ,it is amazing how good that can make you feel.
    I have followed other stylists over the years but your way of thinking is more me especially about rules,I am a rule breaker,for years I tried to wear a belt to create a waist but it just didn’t feel right and I don’t think it works on me anyway,because stylists tell you to do this ,and like the LBD series you did I thought I had to have one of them too,but you helped me make a better choice the LND .
    Your” Real” Nikki and so giving of advice and your time,you are a true gem.
    Have a wonderful holiday in Bali and stafe safe and well x

    1. Thanks Lisa … and yes, you’ve hit the nail on the head with the rules thing – a blanket approach to fashion just doesn’t work because each of us is so different. Finding your own way is the best way. Thanks for being a part of this!

  11. Hi Nikki,

    I too have loved this Style Camp and want to thank you for the wonderful advice and gentle encouragement along the way. I love my Manifesto and it is in a place where I can see it every morning. I think the main piece of advice I have taken away, well there are 2 pieces really, is accessorising each outfit and trying on something I normally wouldn’t. I would never have known accessories could be so uplifting to even my most basic ensemble and I would never have known kaftans could be so flattering and fun either πŸ™‚ . Thank you.
    Enjoy your well deserved holiday have fun and relax.

    P.S Just wanted to say to Jodi, your “Styling You” picture looks gorgeous! Love your hair!

  12. Thanks to you I have just ordered a Cobalt Blue blazer and Coral heels after realising I need some colour in my wardrobe, that I don’t need to wait to lose those 5 kilo’s and that, god dammit, I can wear what the hell I want! Thanks for the kick up the butt πŸ™‚

    Enjoy Bali πŸ™‚

  13. Thank you Nikki for this series, it has been fantastic! I have appreciated the gentle reminders about lots of different things to help my style shine through. And what a great thing it is to share the style love!

    Have a great holiday in Bali. I hope you all have a fabulous time and safe travels. Take care!

  14. Thanks Nikki. I have LOVED this series. You have taught me which basic pieces I need, how to compliment my outfits with accessories and make up and convinced me to try everything on, but most of all you have taught me how to trust myself and just give it a go! Thank you so much x

  15. What a lovely way to end! I especially look forward to completing the women in my life. It’s to get caught up in our own business so a gentle reminder to share the love is appreciated. The Unlock Your Style Camp has been fantastic. I look forward to starting the new school year with some fresh wardrobe ensembles and a confident attitude,thanks to you!
    PS I received my Manifesto and I has become the cover of my diary. A daily affirmation. Thank you.

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