ManLand: the women’s fashion men just don’t get

The other week The Stylist mentioned that an Australian women’s fashion brand was doing its bit for black magic by raising from the dead the scrunchie – that ugly and totally over-used hair restraint from the late ’80s and early ’90s.

While we agreed about the horror of the return of such a despicable accessory, it quickly became apparent The Stylist and I have VERY different views about the good and bad of what women are wearing these days.

There are so many things about women’s “on trend” fashion that us guys just don’t get.

High-waisted jeans/shorts: These things mess with my head. If a women’s waist is down there, why would you put the belt line and top button all the way up there? I don’t think it looks flattering at all; it just looks like you’ve given yourself a wedgy trying to get dressed in a hurry!

Brown brogues and white socks: To me this is another return to the awkward ’80s/’90s. From what I can gather, you girls have an almost endless supply of footwear options to choose from, without having to pull your old brown school shoes from the bin.

Genie pants:  The opposite of the highwaister! Instead of creating an exotic look, the saggy, baggy bum and crotch ends up looking like you haven’t pulled these pants up enough … and that you’ve filled them with something unmentionable.

Gladiator sandals: The ancient Greeks Romans wore these because they didn’t have the benefit of a few thousand years of progress to recognise the error in their footwear ways. Don’t keep making the same mistake.

Cork Wedges: Tacky and nasty. I really don’ like cork wedges on anyone. There are no winners.

Should you want details on these garments (REALLY?), head over here

Maybe you could explain why you love the things I hate? Or maybe, just maybe, you too have been suffering from a dislike of what the fashion world dictates you should be wearing?

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In the bathroom:

It’s been a bit of a L’Oreal month in the tiny corner of the bathroom, in which the Stylist lets me store and play with products.

1. L’Oreal Men Expert Hydra Energetic X-Treme : POW! This is like wiping an energy drink across your mug. And it’s awesome. For the first time L’Oreal Men Expert has added the anti-oxidant taurine to a skincare product that helps to protect against the ageing effect of free radicals, sooth the skin and help it to better protect itself. Perfect for helping your skin recover from whatever you did too much of the day or night before.

2. L’Oreal Men Expert Hydra Energetic X-Treme Cleanser Magnetic Charcoal $12.95: Another first, this time the addition of charcoal, which works like a magnet to trap and remove toxins, excess oil and perspiration – in other words… a long day or night working or playing. My face felt really clean after using this in the shower and the pores on my nose are noticeably smaller.

3. L’Oreal Men Expert Vita Lift 5 Daily Moisturiser $19.45: This moisturiser is great all over your face and neck in the morning and the evening and is great for soothing razor burn after shaving.

4. L’Oreal Men Expert Vita Lift 5 Eye Roll-On $15.85: The icy roll on ball works to instantly sooth and reduce the bags under your eyes, while the Pro-Retinol and Nutri-Peptido Complex lightens the dark circles, fights wrinkles and improves the skin texture.

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In the wardrobe:

I treated myself to a new pair of RM Williams boots last week – a black pair to give my chocolate brown pair a break from the daily slog. Lucky this shirt was just an $19 addition on top of that. Go Mix Apparel at Coles.

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